Day 1899

I've been on pins and needles all day. Time passes very slowly when things are completely out of your control. We got up early this morning and drove Dot to the veterinary specialty center in Lewisville so she could be admitted for surgery. We filled out a bunch of paperwork, said goodbye to Dot, and then we waited. It was very quiet in the house today without Dot to warn us of cats and squirrels in the back yard. Even Dash could sense that something was wrong. I could tell Dot was scared when we were admitting her to the hospital this morning. I tried to reassure her, but I don't think I did a very good job. I was scared too

I tried to keep myself busy while I waited for the all important phone call from the surgeon. I went out to breakfast, even though it was almost lunchtime when we arrived back in Dallas. I finished a couple of writing assignments and sent them off to the client. I took Dash on a long and somewhat cold walk and then did a lot of pacing around the house. Finally, about 4:30 PM, the call I'd been waiting for arrived. The surgeon had good news. The arduous three hour surgery has gone well. The surgeon felt that she had been successful in removing the broken disc fragments in the L1 vertebrae that had been pressing on Dot's spinal cord. Now that the spinal cord is no longer compressed, the nerves will have a chance to heal and if we are lucky, Dot will walk again. Sometimes when a spinal disc ruptures, the fragments become attached to, or embedded in nearby blood vessels and are very difficult to remove. Dot was lucky. The fragments that had broken off and caused her paralysis were still clean and the surgeon was successful in removing all of them.

Dot is still not out of the woods yet, but she survived the surgery. That's the important thing. When the surgeon called, Dot was just waking up from anesthesia and was still under heavy sedation. She will be watched carefully tonight and for the next several days until her condition stabilizes. On Saturday, Dot's physical therapy vet will come to the hospital to give her acupuncture. This, along with cold pacs and laser treatments, will help reduce inflammation and speed healing.The best thing I heard from the surgeon today was that while Dot was waking up from anesthesia, she moved her rear legs. It was just a reflex action, but it means that there is still a nerve connection between the legs and the spine. There is hope.

Dot will spend the next five days in the hospital. While she is recovering, Janet and I will try to prepare the house for her return. We will need to connect the rooms with rubber backed carpet runners so Dot can safely move about without slipping on the brick floors. We will construct a "safe" area where we can leave Dot for short periods of time when we have to leave the house. It is very difficult to crate a large dog with leg injuries, so I am envisioning something that can be placed securely around a dog bed, so she cannot attempt to get up and move about on her own without supervision. Even if things go very well, we will have to continue to support Dot using the Help 'Em Up Harness for quite a while.

Our very first Dalmatian had spinal surgery to remove a tumor when he was eight years old. Spot's recovery was difficult for all of us, but he did learn to walk again and continued to live a happy life. I'm hoping that Dot can do the same. Spot's spinal surgery was the first. I'm hoping that Dot's will be the last. After dealing with nine difficult surgeries on five different dogs, I'm not sure I have the stamina to do this again.

Bingo is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1898

I'll never get used to Texas weather. There was rain mixed with sleet when I woke up. By the time I finished breakfast, the rain had turned to snow. By lunchtime the snow had already melted. By the time I took Dash on his evening walk there were clear blue skies and sixty five degree temperatures. This happens frequently. Actually, I think we are supposed to repeat the whole schizophrenic weather pattern this weekend.

I spent a big chunk of today retouching a photo for a client in Photoshop. It amazes me how much Photoshop has changed the way we look at things during the past twenty years. Photoshop isn't just for Sports Illustrated swimsuit models these days. Everybody uses it. We have gotten so used to looking at idealized perfection that people can't seem to tolerate images that show anything less.

Against my better judgement, I climbed up on the roof and cleared the accumulated water off the roof as soon as the skies cleared. There was an enormous amount of standing water on the roof and I didn't want it to freeze. Yes, within 48 hours another cold wave will arrive and we will have sub-freezing temperatures again. I wish I could just ignore the water, but it is so heavy that the longer I leave it, the sooner it will cause the roof to settle and buckle even more. I think the low spots are already sinking lower, because less water seems to drain off the edge of the roof than it did a few years ago. At least the roof doesn't leak anymore, but my fear is that the roof leaks will start again if I leave four inches of water on top of it continually. In July this water would just evaporate after a rain. Not in February.

I wish I could report that Dot had miraculously started walking again, but she still spends her day laying in various soft dog beds scattered around the house, waiting for me to move her around, or take her out to pee. She is in remarkably good spirits, considering her lack of mobility, but this is no way to live. I really hope that the surgery provides some relief and allows the healing process to begin. If I could ask Dot if she wanted to go through major surgery again, I'm sure she would say no. If I could ask her if she wanted to walk again, I'm equally sure she would say yes. I hope we made the right choice.

I called the hospital again today to confirm our check-in time and continue to hope that Dot will stay strong and be able to cope with the difficult days she has ahead. The surgeon told me that some dogs begin walking on their own within two weeks after her type of surgery. Others of course, require months of physical therapy. I hope that Dot is one of the lucky ones. She has been my friend and constant companion for over a decade now and I don't want to lose her. Please keep Dot in your thoughts and prayers tomorrow as she goes through this difficult but necessary surgery. The surgery itself will take about three hours, which seems like a very, very long time to me.

It feels like there is still a lot of unfinished business today, but it is getting late and we all need some sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a very long day.

Cookie is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1896

The dreaded ice storm wasn't as bad as everyone expected. There was certainly a fair amount of ice and sleet on the ground when we woke up this morning, but we still had electric power and a few brave souls were even out on the roads. I had no desire to join these people. Driving on black ice is just asking for trouble. I started the car to make sure the battery still worked in the sub-freezing temperatures, but I never left the driveway.

There was plenty to do around the house anyway. Taking care of Dot is almost a full time job. She's starting to get cabin fever, so I try to walk her around a bit using the harness whenever she appears restless. Neither of the dogs wanted to be outside for long today. It was just too cold. Dash has become a model of efficiency about doing his business lately. He used to take forever to poop on his evening walks, but for the past two days he poops and pees almost immediately. We had completed our walk and were back in the house within five minutes this evening.

There were no writing jobs today, so I took care of my usual website updates and began editing another video. I can edit using either the laptop or desktop computers, but I've got to choose one or the other. Dot must have thought I picked the wrong one, because almost as soon as I began the tedious editing process in the office, she wanted me out in the living room with her. Even though Dot mostly just sleeps, you can't really let her out of your sight. You never know when she'll try to get up on her own, and since she's still taking prednisolone, you have to be able to get her outside to pee in a hurry.

I'm so glad that our power didn't go out today. Ice and snow days seem to last forever anyway, but enduring frigid weather while trapped inside a freezing house is even worse. Dealing with all these things with a sick and very immobile dog would have probably driven me over the edge. Dot did surprisingly well navigating our icy back yard when I took her out to pee. She had lots of help of course, but it was still encouraging to see her front legs move so confidently on the slick ground.

There is already another NASA event on the horizon and it appears that two people in the group that joined me at Vandenberg Air Force Base are planning to attend. I'm a bit envious. I wonder how these people have the time and money to do this so frequently. This event will be the first test firing of the rocket that will eventually take astronauts to Mars. This is a static test, so the rocket will never leave the ground, but it will still be very impressive. The test site is located near Promontory, Utah, which is even more remote than Vandenberg Air Force Base. Lord know how expensive it would be to fly there from Dallas. Oh, well. Maybe in a year or so, when Dot gets healthy again, I can start thinking about attending these events again.

It's going to be another very cold day tomorrow, but at least the danger of ice is receding. I'm mainly worried about the weather on Thursday, when we have to transport Dot to the specialty center in Lewisville where she will have her spinal surgery. It would be nice if you could deal with all stressful things on clear, warm Spring days, but nature doesn't work that way. As long as we continue to have electric power this week, I guess I'll be OK.

Joey is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1893

We have scheduled Dot for surgery. This was and will remain a very tough decision. Dot is an old dog. She doesn't know this however. Her irrepressible spirit has carried her through tough challenges before and I'm hoping it will again. Watching her progress this week, I am convinced that she is determined to walk again. Unfortunately, it doesn't appear that prednisolone alone will ever provide a realistic path to recovery. After a week on the drug, she still can't stand on her own. Prednisolone isn't a long-term solution anyway and we have already had to reduce her dosage to avoid risks and complications. The real problem is that her spinal cord is still compressed and pinched by the herniated disc. Until this pressure is released, there is a real danger that she could damage the cord further, eliminating any chance for recovery.

If Dot could continue to make small improvements day after day until she eventually walked on her own again, I probably wouldn't even consider surgery. Both the neurosurgeon and my regular vet have already told me that this outcome is unlikely. The initial improvements we saw from giving her prednisolone have already slowed and we can't continue using steroids forever. I'm becoming more and more convinced that despite the risk, spinal surgery is the only alternative that will give Dot a realistic opportunity of walking again.

I really hate making decisions like this, but avoiding them is even worse.You've got to be able to make decisions to lead a normal life. I have known some genuinely indecisive people in my life and most of them were miserable. You simply can't stay sane if you are continually second guessing every aspect of your life. I know that Dot wants to walk again. I also know that Janet, Dot and I cannot continue living like this forever. Our current routine is unsustainable. When Dot finally realizes that she can no longer move, she will become depressed and lose her will to keep going. Janet and I will simply burn out at some point. The surgeon told me today that in the best of worlds, Dot could be walking again within two weeks after surgery. In the worst of worlds, recovery could take up to three months. I can live with that. Of course there is always the possibility that the surgery will fail completely. Everyone says this possibility is very small, but you've got to be prepared for it.

I'm glad I had an opportunity to go out and have my special breakfast this morning. The rest of the day was extremely busy and stressful. I spent the day trying to anticipate what Dot was going to do next while I was working on completing my writing assignments and fine tuning the new business presentation my friend and I are working on. There were some website revisions as well, but I haven't even had time to get around to them yet. I wish that Dot preferred sleeping right next to my computer, but she usually doesn't. The petcams work pretty well for monitoring Dot's activity in other rooms, but I have to act fast if I sense that she is going to try to get up on her own. We don't want her to do that! Dot needs to go outside and pee a lot more often now as well. That's one of the side effects of the prednisolone. So far, I am juggling all these activities pretty well, but it is exhausting.

I'm glad that Dot is still happy. That helps a lot. I wish I could sleep all day tomorrow, but I suspect that tomorrow will be exactly like today. They say that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. If that's true, I should be pretty strong by Summer.

Odie is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1891

I got a call from an old friend this morning, asking if I'd like to work with him on a new business proposal. It was kind of therapeutic to have something to think about other than sick dogs. If we got this business, it would be fun to work on. Almost like old times. I gave my friend an enthusiastic "yes" to his proposal and will begin working on a budget for the project tomorrow.

Janet and I are having a tough time making a decision about spinal surgery for Dot. We have both talked to friends with back problems and some have opted for surgery while others wouldn't even consider it. Spinal surgery is very different from repairing broken bones or removing tumors. Even the surgeons themselves are very guarded about promising a successful outcome. All I know is that sometimes it works and other times it doesn't.

For the moment, Dot seems happy enough. She isn't depressed and doesn't appear to be in much pain. Dot spent a big part of her day sleeping before the injury and she still spends a big part of her day sleeping. She still very enthusiastic about eating her dinner and she can pee and poop relatively normally with my assistance. The only thing she really misses is her morning walk. I can see the disappointment in her face when I take Dash on a walk without her. If I walk Dash, Janet stays behind with Dot. If Janet walks Dash, I stay behind. One of the things I need to ask the neurologist before we make a decision is whether she will ever be able to take a normal walk again, with or without the surgery. Dot loves her walks, and if her walking days are already over, it might be pointless to put her through the trauma of risky major surgery for nothing.

This month's credit card bills took my breath away. The trip to Vandenberg Air Force Base to watch the satellite launch, the recent cancer re-checks and ultrasound imaging for Dot and Dash, along with Dot's recent MRI were all on the same bill. I definitely hope my friend's big new project materializes. One way or another, I'm going to have to step up my game a bit to pay for this stuff.

Dot's vet is terrific. She's going to make another house-call tomorrow to give Dot acupuncture and evaluate her condition. I've seen improvements in Dot's condition every single day, but I don't know whether these small changes will continue or ever be enough. Even with the prednisolone, Dot still can't stand up on her own. The question I have for all vets at one point or another is "what would you do if this was your dog?" Usually they're pretty honest.

All in all, today wasn't bad. Dot and I are working out a routine that gets us through the day. Janet already has a nice job offer on the table from someone she respects. For the past two days I've been able to take care of Dot while still completing my normal workload. Maybe we can get through this after all. It was even relatively warm and sunny today. By the time Dash and I took our evening walk, it was 60 degrees.

Bailey is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1890

The hardest thing about caring for a sick dog is that they don't understand what's going on. Even in her weakened and very compromised condition, Dot still wants to go about her normal life. If I wasn't continually watching her like a hawk, Dot would attempt to drag herself around the house, further damaging her already fragile spinal cord. In situation like this you've got to confine the dog to a small safe space where they can't hurt themselves, while still providing enough attention and activity so they don't become terribly depressed. Since Dot is taking prednisolone, she doesn't even have the luxury of sleeping for long periods of time. The drug makes her drink lots of water and urinate frequently, so she has to go outside and pee every few hours. I have to be prepared to move her with the Help 'Em Up Harness on very short notice. So far, I think I'm doing a pretty good job with all this, but it's exhausting.

During the periods when Dot was sleeping today, I managed to write another new article and submit it to my client. There were also a variety of website management issues that needed to be dealt with along with some client correspondence that needed to be addressed. With my isolated, computer centered work environment, I imagine that my work life will continue pretty much as usual. I will still sit in a small room and stare at a large monitor for long periods of time. I can still do anything that can be accomplished using a keyboard and a phone. I just can't do anything else.

I was hoping the decision that needs to be made about surgery would become easier as I watched Dot's progress. So far, it hasn't. I see small signs of improvement each day, but they are very small. I don't know if it will be weeks or months before her condition becomes significantly better. The main problem is that I don't have months. If the prednisolone isn't effective at reducing the inflammation in her spine enough for Dot to stand on her own again, her paralysis will become permanent.

Dot's vet is going to come over to the house in a few days to evaluate her condition and give her another acupuncture treatment. I'm hoping that she is able to see something I might have missed. It was much easier to make a decision about Dot's abdominal and Dash's thyroid cancer last year. Even though the surgery was risky in both cases, they both had to have it, or they would die. The surgeon was also very confident about his ability to remove the tumors. Spinal surgery is a lot trickier. Removing a foreign object from the spinal cord without damaging the cord itself is a very delicate process and extremely difficult for the best of surgeons. The fact the Dot would have one of the best neurosurgeons in Texas doing the operation still wouldn't give her more than a 60% chance of success.

I've been through this before with other dogs, but I was younger then. I'm incredibly tired right now. I know it's just a matter of time before this crisis joins all the other traumatic moments in my past. Even the healthiest of dogs won't live forever. Janet will probably return to work as soon as this crisis is over. It's a mystery to me why she doesn't enjoy retirement, but it is an equal mystery why dogs don't live longer. Whatever happens, I'll still be here recounting the tiny details of daily life. Dot and Dash might not be able to make it until Day 5000, but I'm determined to hang in there.

Lexi is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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