Day 2768

It's been three years since Dot suddenly became ill and I thought we were going to lose her. I learned a few days later that she had cancer and I'm still learning how her incredible determination to survive changed me in ways I don't fully understand. From the summer of 2014 to the summer of 2017 Dot defied the odds over and over again, forever becoming my hero in the process. I became so convinced that she could go on forever that it's still hard to believe that she's not with us today.

Caring for Dot became a way of life that made it easier for Janet and I to care for each other while we've been dealing with our own medical problems this summer. We're both getting better now and there is a little less fear of the unknown with each passing day. As long as Dash doesn't give us another scare with his ongoing vestibular disease problems, there will come a day pretty soon when I will no longer be either a patient or a nurse.

What comes next? When people tell me "you can do whatever you want," I am baffled. I'm not sure what I want. I need to focus on realistic choices, since going back in time isn't really an option. When I look backwards, I see so many fond memories. When I look forward, I only see the Zombie Apocalypse. This certainly isn't the world I envisioned when I was making big plans back in the 1970's.

I'm not going to change the world at this point, but I need to become more comfortable living in it. Like it or not, it's the only world we've got. I have a feeling that something pretty simple might do the trick for me. Maybe I should take piano lessons. Years ago I used to enjoy playing the piano, but I have forgotten everything. Maybe I should drive to Wyoming with a sleeping bag and a camera and wait for the eclipse. That's probably a little too bold, but you get the idea. I know there's a world beyond cleaning the house with a pressure washer. I just need to find it.

I went back to the store today and picked up the things I forgot yesterday. I got caught in a brief rain storm on the way home, but it was so hot outside that the rain turned to steam in a matter of minutes. By this afternoon, it was hard to imagine that it had rained at all. We've started walking Dash very early in the morning so he is able to enjoy at least one good walk before the heat becomes oppressive.  He seems to enjoy this new schedule. I'm watering the new grass religiously, but it's going to be an uphill battle to keep it looking good for the rest of the year. What can I say. It's hot. It's Texas. It's summer.

I decided to skip going to the gym today. The swelling in my leg has subsided, but it is still pretty sore. My wrist doesn't feel very strong either. I'm supposed to see the orthopedic specialist later this week. Maybe I'll just ask him when it is OK to exercise again. Until then, I'll try to amuse myself one day at a time.

Jewel is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day