Day 1990

I'm torn between a desire for more work and an equally strong desire to just pack it in and formally retire. It would be nice to be able to buy a new car whenever I felt like it and acquire new cameras and watches with reckless abandon, but I'm not sure it is worth the effort any more. When I started my company, I used to tell students and freelancers to never work for anyone who paid you out of their own pocket. Things were much easier when all my clients were large corporations and the bills went to the accounts payable departments instead the owner of the company. Now virtually all my customers are small businesses and nothing is ever fast enough or cheap enough. It becomes tiring after a while.

I only mention this because some new work came my way today and all of it seemed about as interesting as cleaning up Dot's dog poop. Truthfully, I have been interested in learning how to design responsive, mobile friendly websites, but I'm not making any money doing this. I actually gave away my first two mobile friendly sites because I felt vaguely guilty that my clients didn't have this capability already. I'm just not very aggressive about making money anymore. When people ask me to do something these days, my first response is usually to try and talk them out of doing the job. It's only when they're persistent that I agree to take on new work. I usually know in advance that the job isn't going to pay very well and the client is going to be picky anyway. It's hard to get excited about all this because I still remember the days when corporate clients used to fly me around the world and pay me large sums of money for just coming to their meetings and talking a good game.

I still put in a good days honest work, but what matters to me now are the dogs. They both got a long, rain-free walk this morning and Dot spent the afternoon with me at her physical therapy session. She did great today in the underwater treadmill and seemed to enjoy her acupuncture therapy. Even the vet was impressed at how much she'd improved since last week. I think last week's lethargy might have been weather related. At her age, Dot is bound to have arthritis, along with all her other problems. Muggy, rainy weather just isn't good for anyone's arthritis.

I got a lot done today. The roof is clean and dry again. The dogs prescriptions have been renewed. The trash has been taken out to the curb for Friday morning pickup. Dot got a good workout at her therapy session and I paid the last of the recurring bills for May. Tomorrow I've got several new articles to write and I've got to decide whether to pursue these new jobs that are being dangled in front of me. All in good time. The most important thing tomorrow is going to my favorite restaurant for a leisurely breakfast. It didn't rain today. Maybe it won't rain tomorrow either. There's always hope.

Sam is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1689

It was a long day. Dot is having trouble getting up and down. We're kind of between a rock and a hard place. She's still too weak for physical therapy, but it was the physical therapy that was keeping her strong in the first place. She's lost a lot of weight along with some muscle mass, but we sill have to feed her a bland diet with small portions until her incisions have fully healed. It's a balancing act. I know Dot would like to eat large meals to pack on the pounds and then go on a long walk. She's not ready yet, unfortunately. First she needs to be able to get out the back door without stumbling on the single small step down to the patio. It's hard to tell this to a sick, but very stubborn dog. Especially when she thinks she's ready to go anywhere.

It didn't help matters that it poured rain during the morning and the stock market dropped over 300 points during the afternoon. All in all, it wasn't a very auspicious day. I probably shouldn't worry about Dot so much, since she has been making steady progress every day. I know that this is going to take time, but it's sad to see her muscles start to atrophy again, especially since we've all worked so hard this year to keep her active and strong.

There were more website problems to unravel today. First on the list were calls to technical support to find out why a client's online forms weren't working properly. I'm beginning to hate online forms and databases, since they tend to crash every time the hosting company changes servers. The rest of my day was spent trying to figure out how to modify a site that I didn't build in the first place. Working with other people's code can be baffling at times. Why did they do it that way, I wonder? Sometimes I learn something from unraveling these mysteries, but mostly it's just irritating.

There will be no trip to my favorite breakfast restaurant tomorrow morning. I had initially thought that I might be able to get away for short periods when Dot's condition stabilized, but since she's having trouble getting up and down, I need to stay nearby. Dot needs to rest. The last thing she needs right now is to get frightened while struggling to get up after she's been sleeping. Old legs sometimes need a boost, and I've had lots of experience keeping senior dogs walking. I talked to Dot's physical therapist today and hopefully we can get her back on the water treadmill soon. Water therapy is great for older dogs, because the buoyancy of the water takes weight off the tired muscles while still allowing a full range of movement.

I'm still having trouble comprehending that it's August already. I guess it will be OK to give Dot her monthly heartworm pill in the morning. One more question I forgot to ask. We were told to go ahead and continue heartworm medication after Dash's surgery, and after Spot's as well. I'll probably still call the cancer center first thing in the morning though. I hate ambiguity.

I'm looking forward to the weekend. My Jawbone fitness band said I slept less than three hours last night. I think I need to rest just as much as Dot does.

Shelby is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1558

We went up and photographed dogs at the Dalmatian Rescue kennel today. One of the dogs was actually being adopted while we were there and it was nice to see him go to his new home. There aren't as many abandoned Dalmatians anymore. I think the irresponsible people have moved on to other breeds. That's a good thing. Most of the Dalmatians who get adopted now go to homes that have had a Dalmatian before. These people love and understand the breed and the dogs find good homes. I'm sure there are still people who see a popular movie and end up wanting a dog for all the wrong reasons. At least that dog isn't a Dalmatian now. Hopefully, Disney won't make any more 101 Dalmatian movies. That movie was largely responsible for the surge in abandoned Dalmatians in 1996.

The weather got cooler again today. This is the time of year when Janet keeps turning on the air conditioner and I keep turning on the heater. Back and forth we go. During these in-between times, I'm always cold and she's always hot. In a month or so, there will be no more ambiguity. By the time June arrives, everybody will be in agreement again. Texas summers are hot.

Our water bill is going to be high next month. One of the things about new grass is that you have to water it constantly. It's ironic. We got the grass to keep the dogs from getting muddy, but now that the entire yard is a soggy mess, the dogs get muddy anyway. Hopefully, the grass will last a little longer than it did last year. The landscape guys treated for grubs again, but grubs are a perennial problem in Texas. No matter what we do, we always seem to have grubs.

I thought Janet would laugh at my idea of putting a little scarecrow on my car mirrors to ward off the pooping redbird. She apparently liked the idea though, because when she was shopping today, she got a bunch of little rubber birds at the Dollar Store and now her car has little bird scarecrows on the mirrors as well. The mailman will probably think we are crazy.

I need to go to the gym tomorrow. I need to figure out how to resume going during the week as well. Now that it appears my liver is improving, the real challenge will be avoid slipping back to my old unhealthy ways. I've always been able to rise to the occasion during difficult times. I'm a big advocate of that old "When the going gets tough, the tough get going" adage. When the danger is over, I'm a terrible backslider though. I definitely don't exercise and eat Kale for the sheer joy of it. At heart, I'm more of a bacon and beer kind of guy.

Brooke is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1548

I finally talked to an oncologist about Dash. I guess I was hoping for a conclusive answer, but what I heard was ambiguous at best. The oncologist said the pathology report didn't go into enough detail and that she would have to call the lab. What she did see didn't sound good. She said some of the carcinoma cells were the type that tended to get into the blood stream and the only way to effectively treat this was through chemotherapy. How long? Six months was typical, she said. How do you know if the treatment worked, I asked? Well, you don't ever know definitively, she said. Cancer cells are microscopic and they can always be hiding somewhere. I guess this is why you hear people say things like "I've been cancer free for five years." That's all they really know.

Medical issues are starting to wear me down. Doctors are far from infallible and you either trust them or you don't. I am not a trusting person, but what other choice do you have?  If you do nothing, you or your pet dies. If you do everything that is asked of you, you may die anyway. It's very frustrating. Modern medicine is very expensive. Doctors don't always agree on things. And a treatment that is in vogue with doctors today can easily become one of those "Call 1-800-BAD-DRUG" commercials tomorrow. Already, some tests and screenings I had ten years ago, are considered ineffectual or even worthless today. That's the thing about medicine. It is always evolving.

I'm not even sure that Dot's water therapy really works. I'd like to believe that it helps, but how do you know for sure? There could be a dozen reasons why she appears stronger now. She could also stumble and injure herself tomorrow, despite everything I've done. That's just the way life it. I'll continue the water therapy though. Seeing her walking in the tank gives me a positive, hopeful feeling. There is nothing dangerous about the water treadmill either. Chemotherapy is different. There are quite a few risks to chemotherapy. You just hope that the rewards on the other side are worth it.

The editor of the cookbook I'm featured in wrote today and told me that the SXSW Cookbook had just gotten a great review in The New York Times. She also told me that my own recipe was one of her personal favorites and that she's cooked it for breakfast herself. Amazing! This is one development that I never would have predicted. Although I love to eat, I certainly wouldn't consider myself much of a cook. Hey, if I can wind up in a popular cookbook, I might get that Amtrak writer's residency grant too. You never know. I never thought I'd be a spokesperson for Paypal either.

This is why I don't like medicine. I've generally led a charmed life. I bumble around aimlessly, and good things happen to me anyway. Medicine doesn't work this way. Whatever you do, you continue to age. The more you age, the more your body deteriorates. Dash is still a young dog though. In dog years, he's much younger than I am. He certainly deserves a shot at living a normal life for another seven or eight years. I just hope that chemotherapy doesn't make his life miserable.

Lance is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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