Day 2726

I'm tired. I mowed the grass, I went to the gym, I did some laundry, and I took Dash on two walks; all on very little sleep. Basically, this was just a typical Sunday, except I substituted mowing the grass for vacuuming the house.

The rat is gone. It didn't end the way I wanted it to. In fact it ended horribly. I was awakened about 3 AM by an awful commotion in the atrium. Instead of heading for one of the two Havahart traps where he would have been completely safe, the rat activated the kill trap. Even though the packaging on this trap said "guaranteed to kill rats instantly," the rat was still alive. It was making a terrible sound and dragging the trap all around the atrium.

I guess this shows that you'd better be careful what you wish for. I wanted the rat gone, but not this way. I got dressed, found a large bucket in the greenhouse, and proceeded to catch the dying rat and put it in the bucket. I had to bring the rat inside the house to take it out the back door, because the only entrance to the atrium is a large sliding glass door in the living room. There was no way to comfort the injured animal. I just had to watch it die.

I had trouble going back to sleep. I felt like this was my fault. I had the best of intentions with the Havahart live traps, but once the rat managed to escape from the live trap that first evening, it would never go inside them again. I've had to deal with a large rat inside the house once before and I didn't want to face this challenge again. Once, a rat fell down a standpipe on the roof, swam through the plumbing and jumped out of the toilet. It scared the hell out of me. I had a hard time catching that rat, so you can understand why I wouldn't want another one in the house. At least I wasn't sitting on the toilet at the time.

I felt melancholy for most of the day. Nothing really happens the you expect it will. I've been surprised again and again. If you had asked me in my thirties what I would be doing at sixty-nine, my answer wouldn't have any relationship to what I am actually doing today. Sometimes I wonder if there is any point in planning at all. Like the poet Robert Burns said, "The best-laid plans of mice and men often go awry."

I definitely don't have a plan for tomorrow. There is certainly a long list of things that need to be done. I think it's time to test Dash's triglyceride levels again. I need to ask the vet whether he needs to fast for 12 hours or 24. I sure hope it's just 12. I need to make an appointment for my annual physical as well. I've been so busy taking dogs to the vet, that I've kind of been ignoring my own health. I need to call the landscapers again. They seem to have forgotten about us. So many things to do and I can't get excited about any of them. I'll make my coffee in the morning, drink my fruit smoothie, and we'll see what comes next.

Willa is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 2720

The rat has vanished. When I went to set the rodent free this morning, it wasn't in the trap. How could this be? The trap was still closed and locked. There were no signs that the rat had tried to chew its way through the heavy wire mesh. The trap looked exactly like it did last night, except there was no rat inside and all the cheese was gone. I was dumbfounded. I still have no idea how the rat escaped, but if it was smart enough to get out of a closed and sealed Havahart trap, it will probably never go near one again. This is very irritating. Now, how am I going to catch this rat?

This morning was way too quiet. This was the first time since Dot passed away that Dash and I were alone in the house, resuming our solitary weekday routine. The house seemed empty and so did I. For the past two years, everything I've done has been centered around Dot. I kept thinking "what do I do now." There was no bucket list and few pent up desires. I tried to take Dash on an extra long walk, but he seemed lost as well. Dot's oncologist had warned me that something like this might happen. "When you invest as much of your time as you have," she told me, "you aren't going to get over this quickly."

Life will never return to normal, because it was never really normal in the first place. I'll adapt though and find new priorities. I always do. I don't think there's any rush. A little floundering around never hurt anybody. I can certainly stay busy cleaning the house for a while. There is a lot of work that needs to be done. I'd like to make sure that Dash feels comfortable. He's a nervous dog who always depended on Dot. It's going to take him a while to regain his confidence. Probably the best thing I could do for Dash is to regain my own confidence as well.

I had one of my periodic meeting with my financial adviser today. For the first time in a long time I wasn't mad at him. We seem to be on the same page again, but I'll be the first to admit that this is always easier to do in a rising market. I've already lived through too many market crashes and feel that I might not have time to recover from another one. We mostly talked about how to preserve what I've got in the event that Armageddon is on the horizon. I don't have a lot of faith in the future, but I still want to beat the odds.

I wish this rain would stop. We've been having thunderstorms almost every day. Dash hates the thunder and lightning and I hate all the mud in the yard. Ordinarily, the landscapers would have replaced all the backyard grass by now, but there are a lot of bills this month, so I'm not in a big hurry to incur any more expenses. I paid my annual homeowners insurance, so that's out of the way, but ever time I start up the car, I see that irritating "Service Required" warning on the dash. How much is that going to cost?

It's a shame that my main writing client has gone dormant. Writing is always a good way to stay busy. Now, the most important thing on my calendar is catching a large rat.

Scooby is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day