Day 1213

It was another day of small discoveries. One of my doctors has been telling me for months now that I need start lifting free weights to rebuild the muscle mass I had lost to statin drugs. I never really felt that I had the time, and definitely wasn't looking forward to joining a gym. Much to my surprise, I discovered that I have all the time I need. I now have a set of small hand weights on my desk that I use whenever Photoshop or Final Cut Pro gets bogged down rendering something. With the nature of what I do most days, this provides me with a more than adequate upper body workout. I don't know if lifting weights while editing qualifies as multi-tasking, but it sure beats staring at a progress bar on the screen as my complicated video transitions slowly render.

While we're on the subject of video editing, I discovered an amazing app that turns your iPad into a sophisticated touch sensitive control surface for professional audio and video software like Pro Tools, Media Composer, Final Cut Pro, and Logic. Every time I get a big editing job, I toy with the idea of buying a dedicated hardware control surface. You can save a huge amount of time during an edit session if you don't have to use your mouse for everything. Unfortunately, the time-saving control surfaces can be quite expensive. The iPad app solves all that. For a small fraction of what you might pay for a dedicated controller, the clever app gives you full control of your editing software via WiFi.  It's all pretty amazing to me. Of course I downloaded the app. Now I've got a phone that can control my DSLR and a tablet that can control my editing software. Who would have thought?

I've been toying with the idea of trying some sort of vegetarian breakfast. I'm not sure what this would consist of, but I'll bet it involves Tofu. When you try to eliminate meat, dairy products, and wheat, your options become rather limited. Maybe eggs aren't so bad. Maybe a little meat isn't so bad either. I think the real problem for me had turned out to be wheat products. My body seems to convert wheat products straight into sugar. My love for pancakes and french toast is probably what put me right on the verge of diabetes. Now that I avoid bread, biscuits, pancakes and other things made with processed flour, my blood sugar levels are back in the normal range. I carry little packets of Stevia around with me when I go to Starbucks now. My somewhat impossible goal is to eliminate sugar from my diet entirely.

The weather is looking quite nice again. I'm not going to be able to put off mowing the lawn much longer. Maybe tomorrow I'll have time to take the dead lawn mower batteries to the battery store and have them replaced. I should get the batteries for the cordless electric drill and the travel shaver replaced at the same time. Everything seems to depend on batteries these days.

Tyson is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1212

What a difference a day makes. When I went to bed last night, it was warm enough to turn the air conditioner on. By morning, the temperature had dropped 40 degrees and condensation caused by the rapid cooling covered the windows with dew. For the third or fourth time this season, I had to dig out my goose down ski jacket to walk the dogs. Winter just won't give up this year.

Since the cold front that blew through town last night was accompanied by copious amounts of rain, I re-arranged the living room furniture and strategically placed a few buckets on the floor before the dogs and I left on our morning walk. When we returned, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that there were no leaks and no water in the buckets. There was still plenty of water to sweep off the roof, but I must have done a better job of patching than I thought the other day.

Like most rainy days when I am more or less confined to the house, I got a lot done. I updated two websites, wrote an article about Ron Johnson's demise at JC Penny, and still had time to get all my April invoices posted and in the mail. Since there wasn't much to choose from in the refrigerator, I thought I'd try my new online to-go menu at a nearby restaurant right across from the post office. I placed my order as I got in the car with my letters and my dinner was ready and waiting for me as soon as I had finished mailing them. No waiting at all! I was impressed and will definitely be using this convenient new way of ordering take-out again.

No dog training class tonight. It was far too wet and way too cold to be parading around a muddy field with two Dalmatians who would rather be home anyway. I think Dot and Dash had the right idea. After tramping around on the roof for an hour with the big push broom, I had no desire to get wet all over again. I turned up the furnace a bit, used the new juicer to make myself a pitcher of fresh orange juice for tomorrow, and settled down to enjoy my Mango Tilapia take-out dinner. I'm not picky anymore. Any day where it rains and the roof doesn't leak is a good day to me.

Apollo is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1211

I paid a visit to my watchmaker today. A lot of my clients are irritating, but I always enjoy talking with the watchmaker. He's a charter member of that dying breed of people who can actually fix things and understand how mechanical things work. When I was growing up, the United States was full of these clever, industrious men, but there are very few left. I tried to explain social media to the watchmaker while he repaired a beautiful old Angela Cummings watch of Janet's. The watchmaker and I both love cars, so we talked about exotic machines we've owned and would like to own. The watchmaker has a vintage Porsche and I have an old Maserati. At least his car runs. Mine doesn't. The watchmaker regaled me with stories about inept customers who destroyed their expensive Rolex by trying to fix it themselves. I told him about ad campaigns that failed miserably when the client refused to listen. It was a very pleasant afternoon.

I made an appointment to take Dot to see a neurologist next week. She's going to need a CAT scan to make sure she doesn't have a brain tumor. Apparently, the symptoms that she's been having could be caused by epilepsy, a tumor in the brain, or by something else entirely. A CAT scan, or possibly a MRI of her brain, will help pinpoint the cause of her recent seizures. It's too bad dogs have trouble staying still on their own. A CAT scan or MRI is a relatively simple procedure for humans. I've had many of these scans myself. Part of the procedure involves holding your breath for up to 20 seconds at a time while the image is being created. Not surprisingly, dogs have trouble holding their breath, so they have to be sedated under general anesthesia during the scan. Dot is not going to like all this, but it needs to be done.

My poison ivy is starting to get better. The steroid treatments really do work. There's a downside however. It's not a good idea to take steroids for this sort of thing more than once a year. It  looks like I'm going to have to be extra careful not to catch another case of poison ivy later this summer. This is going to be tough, because I'm seeing the stuff everywhere now. I see fresh, green little poison ivy plants on either side of the trail during our daily walks. I've told Dash to help me out on this, but I don't think he was listening.

There are supposed to be thunderstorms tomorrow, but I hope they don't materialize. I'm not sure if I was able to pinpoint the source of the latest roof leak during last week's round of storms. Not really looking forward to plastic buckets strategically placed all around the living room floor again. Dot is scared of storms too and I'm worried that thunder and lightning might trigger another seizure. Maybe the weather will surprise me and turn out to be nice. I think I deserve that.

Livy is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1210

I liked the roofing people that came over to look at the house today. These roofers work almost exclusively with architects on new construction jobs, as opposed to all the other roofers who seem to spend most of their time dealing with insurance claims adjustors on hail damage jobs. I was genuinely impressed with these guys. They were knowledgeable and were able to come up with creative solutions to my own peculiar roofing problems. Unless their bid comes in prohibitively high, I think I've found the company that's going to put on my new roof.

It looks like Dot is going to be seeing a neurologist in the neat future. When I described Dot's symptoms to the vet this afternoon, she said that Dot was most likely experiencing either a mild petite-mal seizure, or showing very early signs of a possible brain tumor. I made a short movie of Dot last night and when my vet saw it, she pointed out some telltale signs of abnormal vestibulo-ocular movement that indicated Dot was probably feeling a severe case of vertigo and was having difficulty maintaining an upright orientation. This all made a lot of sense, and seemed to describe Dot's two other incidents perfectly. Evidently, this type of balance disorder can be an early sign of inner ear problems, low blood pressure, brain tumors, and stroke. Dot will probably have to get either a CAT scan or an MRI later this month. One way or another, we'll find out what's going on.

One of my clients wants me to take over their social media efforts. I'm trying to decide what to charge for this kind of service, and a bit reluctant to even get involved in a project like this at all. In my experience, social media is a bottomless pit. Anyone can be a spammer, but if you really want to have a continuous stream of new and interesting content, you'd better be prepared to spend an enormous amount of time and effort. I think that's why a lot of companies give up on social media. They usually start out with good intentions, posting new and interesting stuff for several weeks, or even several months. Eventually, they discover that they've either run out of things to say, or run out of time to say it. Since I can write about anything almost indefinitely, people often want me to do their social media for them. This takes a lot of time though. More time than I typically have. I don't think my client will be willing to pay for what it would take to do this right.

I ran out of time today before I got around to going over to the battery store to get a new battery for my lawn mower. Maybe tomorrow. I didn't really feel like mowing the grass today anyway. The best news of the day was when my accountant called late in the day to tell me I'd be getting a tax refund this year. Yay! That's the kind of news I like to hear.

Cooper is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1209

It's time to start mowing the grass again. Once again, when I got the mower out of the greenhouse, it refused to start. This has happened to me every Spring for almost as long as I can remember. I had high hopes that the mower would start without incident this year. First of all, I'm using an electric lawn mower now, which has considerable fewer parts that can break. Secondly, I completely replaced the 24-volt battery pack with a brand new set of batteries last Fall. Apparently the expensive batteries only last a single season, because they no longer hold a charge.

I didn't even try to start the old Yazoo gas mower that was also in the greenhouse. The distinctive looking high wheel mowers were produced in Mississippi for many years and built like a tank. That doesn't help me much now, because there hasn't been a Yazoo dealer in town since 1995. The mower's big bicycle tires are both flat now, and I threw away the old gas can at the hazardous waste disposal site, along with a bunch of dried up paint cans, about three years ago.

Since I was unable to cut the grass, I went up on the roof and tried again to find the source of the latest leak. After pulling up a poorly applied asphalt strip from an old repair, I found a suspicious looking damp spot underneath. I cut away the faulty material with a big pair of sheet metal shears and dried everything out with some old dog towels I was about to throw away anyway. As I was working, the wind picked up and I began to feel a few drops of rain. I didn't think I was going to get done in time. Luckily, the skies cleared again, and I was able to carefully re-patch the entire area. I think I did a good job, but unfortunately I ruined a pair of my favorite jeans in the process.

A word to the wise. Don't lose your meds before you finish taking them. Your insurance won't buy you a spare bottle. I discovered this after I lost the prescription I got at the pharmacy yesterday. I couldn't find the pills anywhere and called my pharmacist to see if he would fill the prescription again. Apparently health insurance companies frown on this sort of thing. The $40 bottle of pills that I thought were too expensive anyway, would now cost me over a $100 to replace at full retail cost. Not surprisingly, this added expanse caused me to redouble my efforts to find the lost meds. I eventually did find them. They were outside in the trash can at the very bottom of a plastic grocery sack filled with other trash. Apparently we didn't notice that the pills were still in the bag when we were cleaning up after dinner last night.

Dot and Dash had a great time at the dog park today. The weather was nice and the other dogs were friendly. We even saw another Dalmatian. Unfortunately, I think Dot was a bit too active. Right after dinner, she had another episode where she was shaky on her feet and had trouble getting up. Janet thinks she might have had a seizure, but the way she is acting is unlike other seizures I have seen. I don't think either of us really have a clue about what is going on. Dot is scheduled for a visit with her vet tomorrow anyway and doesn't appear to be in any immanent danger.  Hopefully, I can find out more about what is causing these episodes tomorrow.

Molly is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1208

We went to another casino party tonight. Janet and I usually play roulette at these charity fundraisers, mostly because we are the designated roulette dealers whenever Dalmatian Rescue has similar events. Sometimes we can pick up tips from other dealers that we can use ourselves. Not tonight. The pair at the roulette table this evening were the most inept roulette dealers we've come across yet. They didn't know the odds on the board. They would routinely pay numbers that didn't win and forget to pay number that did win. They seldom paid winners the right amount either. These dealers didn't even appear to know how the game was played. Nobody got mad though. We were just playing with monopoly money and the entire evening was for a good cause. Janet and I are much better roulette dealers than these bumblers though.

The weather finally cleared up today. With an abundance of clear skies and warm temperatures, the dogs finally got the enjoy the newly landscaped back yard. It would have been a good day to do a little more gardening, but I'm still not sure where all the poison ivy plants are hiding. The meds are starting to work, but I still think it's going to be at least another week before the itching subsides.

I had to get all my Saturday chores finished a little early today, since we needed to leave the house for the fundraiser by 6 PM. We ate dinner at the event, so that saved a little time. The rest of the day was spent grocery shopping, doing laundry, vacuuming, making fresh juice out of a big bag of oranges, and looking for the source of the latest leak up on the roof. I couldn't find where the water was coming in, but I did get clean sheets on the bed and gave the dogs a nice long walk before we left for the evening.

I hope I remembered how to use the DVR correctly. I set up the machine to record the new Dr. Who episode this evening, but I haven't had time yet to see if my efforts were a success. So far, the new season of Dr. Who looks like it's going to be a good one. I'm kind of pleased that I've finally mastered the television. I no longer have to watch shows when they are aired. Now, I can watch them any time I want.

Tomorrow is definitely going to be a dog park day. I can tell Dash has cabin fever from being cooped up too long. He needs a chance to run off-leash. With all the rainy weather we've been having this Spring, we've missed our Sunday visit to the dog park for several weeks in a row.

Sam is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1207

I got an enormous amount done today. Once again, I had to spend the day waiting for the FedEx man, and he was very, very late. I have one supplier who insists on marking all shipments direct signature required, while at the same time denying me the opportunity to re-direct the package to a nearby FedEx office for a more convenient delivery. I find this very annoying, but there is a hidden benefit. While I am waiting endlessly for an envelope that needs my signature, I tend to get lots, and lots accomplished around the office.

Today I re-configured an entire website and launched the new version. Ordinarily, this would have taken me three or four days, but what else did I have to do today? I was trapped.

Today's little exercise provides a good illustration of why I've never been fond of SEO types. My client had hired an SEO wizard to boost his Google rank and get his phone to ring more often. The SEO wizard didn't like the site I had designed. He said it had way too many pictures and not enough searchable text that could be indexed. There was plenty of text on the site, but unfortunately, it was all embedded inside pretty JPEG images. To fix the problem and get the SEO guy off my back, I needed to learn something new. To keep the layout intact, I belatedly learned how to create layers in Dreamweaver. I placed Google-friendly text in these new layers and then positioned the layers directly over the pictures I wanted to keep. Amazingly everything worked. After a day of coding confusing CSS scripts, I had a site that looked remarkably similar to the old site, while containing all the new information that the SEO guy said was missing. We'll see if this makes a difference. Probably not.

The temperature was back in the 70's by mid-afternoon. It's still not dry enough for me to determine where the water is getting in on the roof, but it was certainly warm enough for the dogs to enjoy a little sunbathing time in the back yard. I'm a little leery of doing any more gardening in the back yard, unfortunately. I'll probably never know if I got my Poison Ivy from inadvertently pulling up Poison Ivy plants hidden in the ground cover, or from Dash curling up with me at night after a day of running through a field of the stuff. Hopefully, the steroid shots will work their magic soon.

I used a Klout gift card to go out to dinner with Janet this evening. I like these Klout perks, although I have no idea why I keep getting them. So far, I've gotten dog blankets, gift cards, magazine subscriptions, and books. Maybe if I write a nice review about the restaurant, they'll send me more stuff. I wouldn't even have to lie. The food was actually very good.

Angel is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1206

I had to go get a steroid shot for my Poison Ivy this morning. As luck would have it, the doctor who treated me was one of the same doctors I photographed several weeks ago. Luckily, she liked her picture. It's always awkward to get an injection from someone who hates the photo you took of them. Yeah, I know that I told you guys I don't like steroid and cortisone shots just yesterday. It's just about the only remedy I've been able to find that can clear up a bad case of Poison Ivy though. Hopefully, this will be the only case I get this season. I'm very susceptible to Poison Ivy, and the dogs run through patches of the stuff in the park all the time. I'm doomed.

I completed two difficult retrofits to client websites today. Whenever I get these type of assignments, I feel like blurting out "Why didn't you tell me you wanted this when I first designed the site? It would have been so much easier then." The client is always right though, and all of them are a lot more fond of change than I am. I don't think I've ever changed my own website.

I'll really be glad when this cold, wet weather we've been having this week runs its course. It's a constant chore to keep the water of the roof and the mud off the dogs. My boots are just as muddy as the dogs paws when we return from our walks, so I've got to clean those too. The only saving grace is that we've got brick floors. Brick is the most dog friendly surface you can have. Does your dog track mud in the house? No problem. Does your dog occasionally poop in the house? No problem there either. Even water dripping from a leaky roof does far less damage to a brick floor than it would to wood or carpet. I'm a big fan of brick floors.

Good news! I finally got one of the best architects in Dallas to tell me the name of his favorite roofer. Now we're talking! Maybe there's hope for my roof yet.

Dottie is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1205

The day started out with a roof leak in the living room and kind of went downhill from there. I had to have an insurance agent over to the house today and the dogs set some sort of new record for continuous barking. The agent liked dogs and thought he could win their trust by feeding them treats. What the hell. It sounded like a good idea to me. A half a box of dog biscuits later, Dot and Dash stopped barking about guarding the house and immediately started barking for more biscuits. Both dogs were a total embarrassment. You never would have known that they'd been in obedience training for almost six years.

Dot made matters worse by getting herself so worked up that she pooped in the living room. The old girl has trouble controlling her bowels when she gets too excited.

There was a lot of website work today. It was all stuff that the clients probably thought was trivially easy for me to implement. In reality, everything that was asked for today was fairly difficult. I'm still not done. On days like this, I have to bite my tongue and repeat to myself "The client is always right."

The one roofing company that I thought might actually have the solution to my problems refuses to return my calls. The last time I talked to them, I got the strong impression that they weren't interested in residential work, but I haven't given up yet. It's frustrating. Several companies are eager to put on a roof just like the leaky one I have now. But how about a roof that can be actually guaranteed against leaks for ten years? Well, those guys aren't interested in me. They just want to do hospitals and football stadiums.

My accountant called today and said he needed some information from when I bought my rent house back in 1978. Yeah, right! That information is going to be real easy to find. He needs the information to complete tax preparation on the sale of this property, but that doesn't make it any easier to find the documents he needs. I had to really scratch my head to even remember when I bought the place, or what I paid for it.

I had to pick up a part for the Defender at the Land Rover dealer this afternoon and while I was at the dealership, I noticed a brand new Defender 90 on the showroom floor. I asked how they got this car, since Defenders aren't imported to the U.S. anymore. The salesman said they were selling it for a collector who bought the car in Europe. What really caught my eye was the price. They were selling this this simple, utilitarian jeep with roll-up windows and no interior to speak of for $74,000. That seemed like an insanely high price for a car that looked exactly like mine. I asked why the price was so high and the salesman said this European version was very rare and he thought they'd get the price. This seems just as crazy as vintage guitar prices, but whatever. I may have to re-think my plan to get another Defender some day. This one was out of my league entirely.

I'm starting to think that my 'spider bite' is actually an early case of poison ivy or poison oak. I think I'd rather have a spider bite.

Lexi is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1204

Today was full of questions with very few answers. I was on the phone for hours with roofers, insurance agents, equipment suppliers, and clients and ended the day just as confused as I started. Finding the answer to something over the phone is kind of like winning the lottery. Your chances of success are very, very small. Every once in a while you get lucky and end up talking to someone knowledgeable. Most of the time you just get shuffled from one person to another until you eventually give up. I think most of the customer service people I talk with on the phone are just reading from a prepared script they see on their computer screen. They can answer very simple questions, but that's about it. I'd like to tell these people that if my question was that easy, I'd have found the answer already on their company website.

I think I got bitten by a spider last night. That seems like a reasonable explanation for the two swollen lumps I found on my arm and leg this morning. I didn't even bother going to the doctor, since I knew they they would just give me a cortisone shot and send me on my way. I've been bitten by spiders before and the trouble with these type of bites is that unless you actually see the spider biting you, the reaction they produce could be caused by any number of things. So, why do I think I was bitten by a spider? Just a guess, actually. I did see a big spider on the bed a few days ago though. If it actually was a spider, I don't think it was a Brown Recluse, or anything serious. The reaction would have been more immediate and alarming. If the swelling doesn't subside tomorrow, I'll go see a doctor. I just don't like taking steroid shots for any and all types of inflammation. Steroids aren't good.

Dash almost got the wrong shot today. There was a new nurse who didn't know Dash's records well. Luckily, when he mentioned the medication he would be injecting, I noticed that it didn't sound right. He ended up getting the right shot, but it's another lesson that you always have to be on your guard. I wish this wasn't the case, but it is. I would like to just put my brain on automatic pilot for a while and coast. I don't think there would be a happy ending it I did this though. Don't get me wrong. I'm not a paranoid person and certainly don't think anyone is out to get me. I do think a lot of people are incompetent however. Incompetance is everywhere.

It rained today, but the weather radar app on my iPad allowed me to successfully navigate the storms and walk the dogs without any of us getting soaked. Since there isn't much to do on rainy days, I got some more articles written. By the time my client gets back from vacation, I'll probably be all caught up again.

Miracle is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1203

Did anything happen today? I don't think so. The combination of a slow Monday and April Fool's Day made me a bit skeptical of everything I saw on the Internet or heard on TV.  Pranking seems the thing to do these days. Google+ was full of plausible misinformation. I'm not a big fan of practical jokes, but kept thinking it would be funny if everything on Wikipedia and The Onion were actually true today. Who knows. Maybe Kim Jong Un's belicose treats to annihilate the world are just an elaborate April Fool's Joke. I'm a fairly literal person and I find it increasingly difficult to separate fact from fiction. Are the president and congress just pranking us, or is the world really this screwed up? Maybe Kris Kristofferson said it best, when he wrote. "He's a walkin' contradiction, partly truth and partly fiction," Every day is April Fool's to me.

After bragging to the vet during her acupuncture session about how quickly Dot seemed to be recovering, she appeared to have a rough time just an hour later on her evening walk. I guess that just goes to show that you've got to take almost everything one day at a time. Dot is an old dog. I can't let myself forget that.

I wrote some articles today for clients who are still on vacation until Wednesday or Thursday. I don't know what the rush was. I guess I just like to keep busy. I don't like to keep too busy though. Even though I still need some more rocks to complete the back yard, I haven't made a return visit to the rock store yet. Moving all those rocks around last week was hard work. Writing articles is much easier. I'll write another article tomorrow and save the rocks for later.

Janet and I have started receiving an avalanche of mail and telephone calls, all telling us that it's time to start thinking about Medicare. Hey, why don't you wait a while guys. I feel old enough already. I had no idea that Medicare was such a profitable business. Dozens of companies are spending big money sending out fancy four-color brochures and hiring telemarketing companies to solicit my business. I don't know about Medicare, but I do know about marketing. If there wasn't a big profit in all this, these companies wouldn't be trying nearly as hard to get my business. 

Haley is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1202 - Easter Sunday

Two days of rain shut down the dog park this weekend, but the wet weather did have a few benefits. The soil was finally wet enough for me to go pull up all the little oak and elm trees that were growing in the Asian jasmine beds. Every year, acorns and seed pods fall by the thousands from the large trees in our backyard and sprout into small trees during the Spring. These tiny trees have surprisingly deep roots and you can only pull them up when the soil is really wet. If you don't take this opportunity to rid your gardens of these diminutive trees, the root systems will continue to grow and they will be impossible to uproot the next season. In just a few seasons, your entire yard will become an ugly thicket of brush and weeds. Today seemed like the perfect opportunity to do some weeding, so I did.

Even though all the dog parks in Dallas were closed today, the human parks were having their busiest day of the year. As soon as the sun came up, I saw families putting up tents and staking out their territory for huge family picnics in the park behind our house. By the time I walked the dogs in the afternoon, the entire area was like a three ring circus. The air was thick with smoke from hundreds of barbecue grills, and every hundred yards or so, there was an impromptu soccer game going on. At least four times, our walk was interrupted by crowds of little kids running toward the dogs while shouting "Do they bite" in Spanish.

Dot and Dash were very good, allowing all the children to pet them. I could tell Dot was getting tired though. This Easter outing was way too noisy and stressful for her. As soon as we got home again, both dogs went straight to their dog beds and fell asleep.

I was really hungry today. In addition to weeding the garden and walking the dogs, there was also a lot of water from last night's rain to get off the roof. Lucky for me, Janet fixed a fabulous Easter dinner with ham, whipped sweet potatoes, and braised cabbage. I ate lots of vegetables and left just enough room for a pear tart for dessert. It's been a good day. I think I'll be joining the dogs for a snooze on the bed very soon.

Smiley is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1201

I feel like I'm on the verge of something. I have over 30,000 Twitter followers, but no idea what to do with them. I find it increasingly easy to write endlessly, but still have nothing to say. I'm smart enough to realize that most of my successful writer friends have chosen to write about something useful to other people. They write cookbooks and books about parenting which are frequently wildly popular. Those that chose to write deeply personal novels instead, usually sold next to nothing. If they were lucky, they eventually wound up teaching English literature somewhere, totally mired in university bureaucracy and faculty politics. And those that chose to just write about themselves? Well, enough said about that sticky subject.

I only mention this because I've been watching Seinfeld's new Internet series "Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee." I watched all ten episodes last night, and found the show fascinating. All the other comedians Jerry had coffee with seemed to share one thing in common. They all hated the idea of working for a living and couldn't imagine having a boss that told them what to do every day. I've always felt the same way. During my ad agency days, I used to tell friends that I was a prostitute. "People just rent my mind instead of my body. That's the only difference," I'd say. I've always thought that I was a clever guy, but if I ever accomplished anything useful to anyone other than myself, it was purely accidental. I'm still on the verge of something though. I can feel it.

Today, I finally learned how to use the DVR, mostly so I could record the new episode of Dr. Who that comes on later this evening. I hate to watch TV during dinner, but I definitely don't want to miss the new show. I am also determined to find a decent new roof that doesn't cost as much as a new car. A roof should never cost as much as a car. Cars are more fun. Google seems to be helping me with my quest. Every time I complain about my leaking roof on the blog, a new roofing company ad seems to magically appear in my Google Adwords queue. I clicked on one of these ads today and discovered an industrial company that refurbishes commercial roofs with a high-tech coating that is supposedly guaranteed against leaks for ten years. Sounds good to me. Sounds economical too. I think I'll investigate this further.

I've been amazed at how healthy and happy Dot has seemed this week. Maybe the acupuncture treatments and her new vitamins are really helping. I wonder if they have acupuncture treatments for carpal tunnel syndrome? Hey, it's worth a try. For most of my life, I've been very skeptical about alternative medicine. Maybe I was wrong though. I've achieved far better results from going to a good nutritionist and radically changing my diet than with all the prescription medications various doctors have prescribed. Come to think of it, physical therapy proved to be a much better solution to my neck and back pain than all the prescription pain pills too. Maybe some day I can get rid of all the pills entirely.

Sparky is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1200

Since it was a nice day, I thought I'd try to refurbish the gravel pathways in the back yard. What the hell. Since the grass and vegetation look so nice now, it seems a shame not to go the whole nine yards and get everything looking nice. I needed some small white rocks, so I strapped a big black bucket to the back of the Defender and headed for the rock store. It's a bit intimidating going to the rock store, since there aren't many people like me there. The place is a huge field with giant piles of every kind of rock imaginable. There aren't many small cars there. Most of the people getting rocks have huge 18-wheelers that are constantly loading and unloading tons of rocks at a time. I'm always nervous that one of these vehicles will dump a big load of rocks on top of my car and bury me.

To buy rocks, you first weigh your car on a giant scale, fill it with rocks, and then weigh it again. By subtracting the second weight from the first, they determine how many rocks you've bought. I bought 500 pounds of small white pebbles that looked like a good match for the pebbles that I'd already used to make the existing paths in the back yard. My 500 pounds of rocks was probably the rock store's smallest sale of the day.

When I got back to the house, I discovered that my white rocks didn't cover nearly as many bare spots along the path as I had hoped. In fact, my 500 pounds of rocks didn't go very far at all. Judging from the length of pathway my rocks covered, I must have bought 3000 pounds of rocks the first time I tried this. I was younger then of course, and I think rocks must have been lighter too.

I think the waiters at my breakfast restaurant have discovered marketing. I noticed this morning that whenever someone, including myself, ordered anything vaguely healthy, a waiter would say "Would you like to substitute freshly cut fruit for the potatoes?" Most of the people, including myself, said yes. What you didn't realize until they brought the check at the end of your meal is that the freshly cut fruit added three dollars to your bill. Pretty sneaky. Of course, car dealers do the same thing. "Would you like to substitute a Sat-Nav package for that radio," they say. "Wouldn't you like to substitute some nice 21 inch rims for those 19 inch stock wheels?" Happens all the time. It was just a bit unnerving to see a waiter get you to upgrade your breakfast with such ease.

I ended up talking to one of the roofers today. I asked him why roofing prices had gone up so dramatically. He told me that in the late 90's, refiners discovered how to extract more gasoline from crude oil, resulting in fewer petroleum by-products like asphalt. This supposedly cause the prices of roofing materials to double in a single year. Of course, the guy didn't explain why my own roof bid was so high, especially when the company wasn't planning on using any asphalt materials in my new roof at all.

Elliott is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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Day 1199

I went exploring today. Since I'm basically lazy, I did most of my exploring using a keyboard instead of the car. At this point in time, I don't see much point in exploring in the car anyway, especially if the outcome might be waiting for another tow truck to haul me back to the Land Rover dealer for an expensive repair.

So, what did I discover? I was amazed to find that there was much, much more than Netflix and Hulu on the WiFi TV. There were all sorts of free WiFi movie channels. I even discovered a brand new Seinfeld show where Jerry goes and has coffee with friends. That's all that happens! I watched a few episodes and loved this show. Basically, it is the same "show about nothing" premise as the original Seinfeld show. Combine this with the fact that each episode was like a shorter, less intellectual version of My Dinner with Andre and you have a winner, at least as far as I'm concerned.

At some point during the day, I got hungry and noticed that a lot of local restaurants now have online take out menus. Some even have iPhone apps that let you order your take out from wherever you happen to be. After you place your order, you just pick up your food at the nearest location. I would use something like this. Increasingly, I'd just as soon pick up a sack of food and eat my meal at home with the dogs instead of dining out at a restaurant anyway. I downloaded a few of the apps, but didn't use them today. I'm still trying to finish this weeks vegetables before they go bad.

I got some more roof bids in today. Each bid I've received so far recommends a completely different type of roofing material. You'd think since the materials and application procedures were so different that the prices would be different as well. Nope! The price for three very different types of replacement roofs were virtually the same. I'm convinced that putting on a roof is so expensive now because everyone except for me seems to get their homeowner's insurance to pay for the roof. I've never been able to get insurance to pay for a new roof. The adjusters come out to the house and always tell me that the roof has not been damaged by the weather. "It's just normal wear and tear," they say. I wonder how all my neighbors manage to get their insurance to buy them a new roof?  Oh, wait. I know the answer. None of their roofs are flat.

I used the new juicer to make some carrot juice today. Good lord you have to grind up a lot of carrots to get any juice. I have a feeling that it would be cheaper, and certainly a lot easier, to simply buy fresh carrot juice at Central Market.

Doc is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1198

I don't know why I'm so tired today. I certainly didn't do much. To mitigate the effects of a rather uneventful day, I explored Hulu Plus a bit and discovered a wealth of new ways to waste time. I also practiced the guitar for a while until the carpal tunnel pain in my wrist forced me to quit. I can usually play for about forty-five minutes now. Back in my rock 'n roll days, that would have only been one set in a four or five set evening. It's still fun to play though. I usually play through a pre-amp using headphones so I won't bother the dogs. I'm lost in my little world, while they're sleeping on the bed, lost in their own dog-dreams.

I got an e-mail from Angie's List saying that they'd send me a $20 gift card if I'd write two reviews for health care providers. What's that all about? I thought all Angie's List reviews were supposed to be spontaneous and unsolicited. I went ahead and wrote the reviews anyway, but I doubt that I'll ever get the gift card. The whole thing reminded me of the time some meeting planing web site told me that they'd send me an iPod if I filled out their survey. I filled out the survey four times, but never did get the iPod. All I got for my efforts were annoying calls from the meeting planning company, asking me if I'd like to sign up for their expensive service.

I did do some web site work today, but it was all pretty inconsequential. Today's revisions rose to about the same level of importance as the time I spent pumping up the Defender's tires to 32 PSI with an air compressor. I don't know why the tires have a consistent, very slow leak. I also don't know why some clients continue to make consistent, and often needless website changes. It's good to have something to do, however. Without these activities, I would have been forced to watch even more old episodes of Lexx on Hulu.

Although the day started cold, it warmed up quite a bit by the time dog training class arrived. It was actually quite nice outside this evening, so Dash and I had no excuse for avoiding class. Two dogs got in a fight, which scared Dash, but otherwise the training class was as uneventful as the rest of the day. Maybe something interesting will happen tomorrow.

Chloe is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1197

I've had the U-verse service for over a year now, so all the promotions that came with my bundle have expired. This, of course, results in a much higher monthly bill. Why are phone companies like this. It's always some sort of bait and switch proposition. Two can play this game though. I remember when we had Time Warner cable, there was always some guy you could call and get your promotions reinstated if you mentioned that you were thinking of dropping the service. I figured that AT&T must have the same sort of guy tucked away somewhere, so I started calling. After a few false starts, I found the guy in St. Louis. He agreed to knock $40 off my monthly bill and throw in some extra HD channels if I would sign a contract for another year. Done! Mission accomplished. I still don't know why this had to be so hard though. Couldn't they just charge a fair price in the first place.

Maybe the whole concept of a fair price doesn't even exist anymore. I received my first bid on the roof today and was amazed that the price was four times more than the last roof I had installed in 1996. When I called the company and asked how prices could have possible gone up so much, the estimator just said that things had gotten "out of control" in recent years. He didn't offer to lower the price though. Not by one nickel. I sure hope the other bids are more reasonable than this initial one.

The Land Rover dealer hasn't even bothered to return my call about the engine running rough. I think they're getting tired of me. I'm sure they'd much rather just sell me a new car than continue to repair one that is eighteen years old. I like the Defender though. I can't help it if Land Rover continues to postpone re-introducing the Defender to North America again. They ought to be glad to have me as a customer. I could have easily bought a new Kia for what I've paid them in repair bills over the years.

It looks like Spring outside. It just doesn't feel that way. Temperatures were in the mid-thirties when I walked the dogs this morning. It didn't really warm up that much as the day progressed either. I don't think it got much above fifty all day. In between all the wrangling with the phone company and the roofing company about prices, I managed to get a couple of websites updated and paid a few bills. My car is still running a bit rough, but it isn't stalling out at stoplights anymore. I guess that's progress.

Bubba is today's Dalmatian of the Day

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