Day 1150

I spent most of my day answering questions. There were e-mail questions. There were telephone questions. And then there were lots of questions around a conference table at a meeting during the afternoon. I don't really like answering questions. The questions themselves aren't so bad. It's the fact that nobody listens to my answers that gets old. Everyone acts like they're listening, but two or three days later I usually notice that the final outcome has nothing to do with anything I may have said. Usually, when people ask you questions, they just want you to agree with them.

If I was smart, I would agree with everything my client's say. It's easier that way. I usually feel compelled to tell my side of the story though, which seldom accomplishes anything. Maybe I just want to be able to say "I told you so," when things begin to go wrong later.

My little tracker wristlet said I only slept 4 hours and 34 minutes last night. I woke up three times and lay awake in bed a total of 2 hours and 18 minutes. That's not good. Only 1 hour and 58 minutes of my total sleep was the deep sleep that restores you for the next day. As depressing as all this sounds, I wasn't really surprised. I know the dogs keep me awake a lot. They're light sleepers and so am I. Janet, on the other hand, can sleep through anything. It's not all bad news though. Even though I'm only getting 57% of the sleep I need, I am apparently getting over 125% of the exercise I need.

When faced with a choice of doing a bunch of mindless website revisions or getting my February invoices out, I opted to do my monthly billing today and get the invoices in the mail. I should have plenty of time to get all the website stuff done tomorrow, since a long morning meeting I'd been dreading got postponed until next Friday. There's plenty to do tomorrow, but I think my most important decision will be what to have for breakfast. This will be my first restaurant Friday since I've adopted my new healthy diet. Pancakes aren't on the list. Neither are waffles. Biscuits and gravy are out. Bacon is definitely a no-no. I guess I could have an omelet, but I couldn't stuff it full of bacon, ham, chorizo, and cream cheese like I usually do. There's always oatmeal, but where's the fun in that? I've been eating oatmeal all week.

Stortz is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1149

I got a haircut today. Instead of talking about upcoming vacation plans, like I usually do with my stylist, we ended up talking about funeral planning. Betty's father is sick and evidently she is in charge of making the arrangements when the time comes. I was surprised at how much actually I knew about the subject, since it isn't often a topic of conversation. It certainly isn't something you talk about in a hair salon very often. It's been a long time since I've had to make funeral arrangements, but I guess its something you never forget.

When my haircut was finished, I stopped by the Apple store on the way out of the mall and got one of those little wristlets that tracks all your activities during the day. I'm not all that interested in counting calories, but this thing is supposed to be able to tell you how long it takes you to go to sleep and then tracks your light and deep sleep cycles during the night, as well as identifies any waking moments. I don't feel like I get that much sleep, since the dogs are always waking me up. It will be interesting to see if I get any deep sleep at all. I'm afraid the little wristlet will embarrass me and tell me that I'm asleep during the day. It would be an easy mistake for a gizmo to make. I don't move around much when I write.

I think the dogs thought we were taking them on another road trip when we went to training class tonight. They both seemed real disappointed when we arrived at the field where all the dogs were. Dot didn't even want to get out of the car. When we started the exercises, the dogs seemed distracted. Dot would come to other owners voices by mistake and Dash was so fidgety that he would hardly stay still at all. Eventually, they settled down and did everything right, but I don't think they were really into being trained this evening.

I'm a bit surprised at how easy it's been so far to modify my diet. I haven't been seriously tempted by anything yet. I guess this makes sense in an odd sort of way. I'm totally a creature of habit. I'm in the process now of substituting good habits for bad ones, but they are still just habits. Once the new habits become familiar and turn into rituals, it should be easy to maintain them. Habits are a lot different than cravings. Cravings are fueled by desire. Habits, on the other hand, are fueled by laziness. I don't have a whole lot of desire, but I have an abundance of laziness. For once, laziness might actually work to my advantage. Bye bye bacon. Oatmeal, here I come.

Landry is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1148

There's been a lot of controversy on the Internet lately about whether Allopurinol actually works to prevent bladder stones. For years this drug has been the recommended treatment to prevent recurrent urate bladder stones in Dalmatians. My vet recommends Allopurinol and I know many Dalmatian owners who use it. I've always considered the medication very safe. Unfortunately, now there are a group of vets who beg to differ. They say Allopurinol can actually cause the formation of struvite stones. Evidently, unless the pH of the dog's urine is completely neutral, the drug can do more harm than good. I only mention all this because Dash has always been prone to bladder stones. Now, we've got to decide whether to discontinue his Allopurinol treatment or keep on doing what we've been doing for years.

Medicine always seems to be this way. Doctors will tell you something for years and years and then one day you'll go in for a visit and your doctor will say "Never mind. Forget everything I've told you for the past ten years." This has happened to me before and it's always disconcerting. I like to think of doctors as infallible, but that is never the case. Medicine changes and doctors change their minds about a lot of things, just like the rest of us.

The Dow Jones industrial average crossed the 14,000 mark several times today, but apparently my stocks didn't get the memo. I ended up down for the day as the market approached a record high. My Yum Brands shares got clobbered because the Chinese apparently have problems with the Colonel's finger lickin' good chicken. My Baidu shares, on the other hand, got clobbered because investors had problems with the Chinese. It's always disappointing to do poorly on a good day. I'm getting used to it though.

Maybe I'm just imagining things, but I think I'm already starting to feel better as a result of my new diet. I wake up with more energy and don't seem to be as tired during the day. The differences aren't dramatic, but I do notice a change. This is certainly enough of an incentive to keep going with my quest for a healthier lifestyle. Who knows. Maybe I'll even grow to like these changes.

A friend of mine mentioned that he might have a video project for me. That would be a refreshing change from all the drivel I'm writing now. I'd better not count my chicken before they hatch though. The new project might actually be worse than what I'm doing now. I need to find out more.

Zorro is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1147

My learning journey continues. Oatmeal mixed with fresh blueberries and strawberries and sweetened with a little Stevia is actually delicious. Who would have thought? Maybe I can live without bacon after all. I also learned that the Kale I'm eating in my salad is actually the very same purple plant that I used to buy in pots at the garden store to put on the front porch during the Winter. I always thought these ornamental plants were pretty, but never knew you could eat them. I certainly had no idea they were healthy.

I wish I would discover some equally enlightening things about my chosen profession. I'm really starting to get burned out with what advertising has become in recent years. The stuff I write never was intended to be Anna Karenina or Moby Dick. It's depressing how mindless advertising messaging has become however. For the past three or four years I keep thinking that the Super Bowl ads keep getting worse with each succeeding year. There is no subtlety anymore. It's all rudeness and explosions these days. Coke, GoDaddy, Priceline... there wasn't a coherent idea between them. I didn't even like a lot of the commercials that the young bloggers gave rave reviews on their websites. I thought the Taco Bell spot with the old people escaping the retirement home was kind of insulting and even though I thought the Tide "Stain" spot was clever, it wasn't that great. On the other hand I did like some of the commercials that the young folk thought were insulting. The Volkswagen spot featuring white people talking like Jamaicans was panned by many reviewers who said the spot was racially insensitive. What a bunch of politically correct nonsense. That Volkswagen commercial was one of the few genuinely funny spots I saw all night.

Like many of you, I loved the Paul Harvey "Farmer" spot for Dodge Ram. I was terribly disappointed however to discover that the Dodge Ram ad agency didn't actually come up with this idea. A much smaller Chicago agency had already used the exact same Paul Harvey dialog in another commercial earlier. This is sad to me. Copying has become so mainstream that people don't even think it is wrong anymore. Most of my clients would actually rather copy or emulate something that already exists than to take a chance on something genuinely original. I haven't been asked to do anything genuinely original in years.

I was really busy today, but like I've already mentioned, I wasn't doing much original thinking. That monkey the Iranians sent into space recently could have taken my place today. I changed out pictures on websites. I paraphrased things I found on Wikipedia. I replied to mindless questions with equally mindless answers. Maybe something original will happen tomorrow.

Duke is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1146 - Super Bowl Sunday

We left Shreveport behind this morning. I was pleasantly surprised to discover that most of my fears about traveling with the dogs were unfounded. Dot and Dash definitely stepped up to the challenge. They both proved themselves to be great little travelers. With an abundance of dog friendly hotels and roads leading in every direction, who knows where we'll go next.

After we returned to Dallas, I made my annual pilgrimage to the Culwell & Son Superbowl Sale. I go to this extravagant sale every year, because although I no longer go anywhere and don't have money to waste, I still like really nice clothes. I walked away with a couple of great looking shirts and a pair of khakis and went home to watch the Super Bowl.

We usually pig out and eat enormous amounts of meat on Super Bowl Sunday, but in honor of my new found desire to live a healthy life, Janet fixed a delicious and equally nutritious meal. I think she is happy that I'm giving up bacon, ribs and eating half a loaf of bread at dinner. Janet and the dogs have always eaten healthy meals. I've always been the anchor that kept this family's health boat from sailing. Now, maybe with everyone on the same page, doing the right thing may be a little easier for everybody.

You may wonder why I waited so long to do something so obvious. Part of the answer lies in the charmed life I've led. For most of my life I've been able to do all the wrong things and still land on my feet. I ate atrociously and never gained weight. I was a horrible employee and still managed to land a long series of really good jobs. I won't even tell you some of the other things I did, but I can assure you they weren't good. It is becoming increasingly obvious that I've used up eight of my nine lives. I can be foolish and frivolous, but I'm a realist. The time has come to make a few changes.

When I was watching the Super Bowl this evening, I was amazed at how much a power outage at the stadium changed the whole momentum of the game. The Ravens seemed invincible before the power outage knocked out the stadium lights. It was just a random event that delayed the game for fifteen or twenty minutes, but it changed everything. The Ravens floundered and struggled after the delay destroyed their momentum and barely managed to hang onto a narrow win in the game's final seconds. I think life is like this a lot. Random outside events can confuse you and quickly change everything. I guess the lesson of this game is that when life throws you a curve, the only thing you can count on is discipline. You've got to keep plugging away until luck shines on you again. A little simplistic, perhaps, but it worked for the Ravens.

Casey is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1145 - Ground Hog Day

Well, now I can say I've ridden on a Mardi Gras float. Although this little adventure was never on my bucket list, it is an experience I'll never forget. The first couple of hours were kind of interesting. The last four hours reminded me of that old Kingston Trio song about a man named Charlie who was trapped forever riding the M.T.A. Apparently hundreds of thousands of people absolutely love these parades, but I'm not so sure. Riding a float with twelve Dalmatians  through an endless tunnel of rowdy drunks while enduring a sound system dishing out The Village People singing YMCA over and over again at 110 decibels is a lot more like my own private version of hell.

Although I thought the parade would never, ever end, there were brief moments when it all made sense. There is an intoxicating power in the knowledge that you can make huge crowds of people scream and fight over the baubles and trinkets you are throwing out the windows to them. Of course, you have to remember that the crowd can turn ugly very quickly when you run out of things to throw. When we ran out of our bangles and baubles, people started throwing their beer at us.

Dot and Dash were absolutely exhausted when the day was finally over. So was I. Maybe the next time we take them somewhere we should try for something a bit more sedate. A walk along the beach would be nice. Today was more like a walk on the wild side. I'm definitely glad our float didn't run out of gas and leave us at the mercy of that crowd. Not really my cup of tea.

Punxsutawney Phil didn't see his shadow this morning, so I guess we'll have an early Spring. Early Spring sounds good to me. Since I forgot to take my warm coat on this little adventure, I've been cold all weekend. I've been having trouble maintaining my resolve to eat more vegetables too. The food is quite good here, but in a place where Alligator Bites wind up on the appetizer menu, vegetables are just an afterthought. I did have an apple for dinner, but it wasn't on purpose. There just happened to be one in the room. After today's marathon, we were just too tired to go out to dinner. The dogs are already asleep. I will be soon.

Jasper is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1144

I think even Dot was amazed today. Our first attempt at a car trip with the dogs was a resounding success. Dash was unbelievably good. He whined a bit for the first 50 miles, but after that we didn't hear a peep out of him. It probably helped that Janet sat in the back seat between the two dogs during the entire trip, but Dot and Dash certainly did their part. They were good little travelers.

When we arrived at our destination, the surprises continued. The hotel staff seemed delighted to see two Dalmatians checking in and were very nice to us. When we got the food and water bowls set up in the room and scattered a few dog blankets around, Dot and Dash acted like traveling was the most normal thing in the world.

Truthfully, the dogs adapted to the rigors of traveling much better than I did. I'm never very good at planning ahead. I should have checked the temperature and worn a warmer coat. I should have worn more comfortable shoes for driving as well. Luckily, I did remember my reading glasses, or I'd have had a hard time writing tonight's entry.

Dash seems to be having a great time making flying leaps onto the hotel bed. To make things easy on the dogs, we've always had very low platform beds at home. Dash seems very proud of himself that he can hop on top of a bed five times taller than the one he's used to at home. Dot, unfortunately is not so nimble anymore. She's getting old and we have to lift her into the bed. Luckily, she sleeps soundly. If we put her in the middle of the bed, there's little danger that she'll fall off.

Tomorrow will be an even bigger adventure than today. Dot and Dash, along with about a dozen other Dalmatians, will be featured guests in a big Mardi Gras parade. All the dogs have elaborate, satin embroidered Mardi Gras coats that make them look suspiciously like Elvis in his latter years. The dogs will all be riding in a special trolley and their handlers will be tossing small Dalmatian plush toys out to the crowd instead of the traditional beads.

I had initially thought about making a short documentary about this unlikely event, but holding on to Dash's leash during the parade will be a full time job. I've already learned the hard way that cameras and Dalmatians don't go well together.

Dash is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1143

This is going to take a while. Usually, when I'm in a hurry and don't feel like cooking, I'll run down to a nearby barbecue joint and get the brisket platter to bring home for dinner. Tonight, I went to Central Market and got a broccoli, tomato and garlic salad; a grape, walnut and blue cheese salad; and a bowl of tomato bisque. The meal was tasty and satisfying but I couldn't visualize portion sizes very well and bought too much. That's one of the things I don't like about fresh vegetables. They don't stay fresh very long. I forget about the leftovers and they inevitably go bad. Cured meats on the other hand, seem to last forever.

I really haven't had any major goals for quite a while. I have a tendency to just get up and plod through the day, doing whatever is necessary to keep treading water until bedtime. Goals probably aren't such a bad thing. Maybe staying alive a little longer would be an excellent goal to start with. I'm going to try my best to make this healthy diet work. So, if you hear me talking about bacon and cheeseburgers in a month from now, you'll know I'm just another backslider.

We're planning on taking the dogs on a little road trip. We've always wanted to go on a real vacation with them, but so far we haven't been able to go more than five miles without a major mishap. Dot is just as territorial in the car as she is at home. When we pull up at a stoplight, she'll start barking like crazy at people crossing the street or waiting for a bus. Dot's barking usually throws Dash into a panic and he'll wriggle out of his car harness like a canine Houdini and then he's all over the place. Janet is an optimist though. She thinks that if she sits in back with them, the dogs will be calm and well behaved. I have my doubts, but since they spend most of their day sleeping around the house, there ought to be a way to get them to sleep in the car as well.

A friend of mine wants to send a little health care business my way. He asked if I had ever done any of this type of writing and of course I said "sure." I knew I'd done quite a bit of health care writing. I just couldn't remember what it was. A quick search revealed that I'd written an ad campaign about impotency, some brochures about surgical scrubs made out of paper, and a physical therapy video that featured a lot of old people bobbing around in a huge swimming pool. I've done a huge amount of work for veterinarians, of course, but I'm always a bit hesitant to tell doctors and hospital administrators that I consider veterinary medicine to be more or less the same as whatever they're doing. We'll see how it goes. My new business pitches usually go pretty well unless someone wants to actually see me in person.

Cooper is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1142

I had an enjoyable lunch with a friend of mine today. We talked about how much ad agencies have changed since the "Mad Men" days when we both worked at an agency together. Then the subject changed to disastrous oil and gas investments both of us had made. Finally, we tried to top each other with stories about bad doctors and medical nightmares. It definitely wasn't a three martini lunch, since neither of us drank anymore. We both agreed that sixty was definitely not the new forty.

After lunch I went for a consultation with my new nutritionist. I was really impressed with the guy and learned more about the root causes of my various ailments in a two hour consultation than I have in several years of doctor visits.

I've known for some time that I needed to change my diet. I just haven't had anyone tell me exactly how or why. Now I have a plan. Right now, I'm consuming way too much protein and not enough vegetables. I need to cut back significantly on grains. Even whole grains are not that great if you have too much grain in your diet. The reason is that breads and grains easily converted to sugar and excessive sugar is one of the main causes of diabetes. I should be eating a diet that consists of no more than 10% grains and 20% animal proteins. The rest should be fresh vegetables. I should be eating four times more alkaline foods than acid foods to keep everything in balance.

Foods like broccoli, brussel sprouts, kale, cabbage, artichokes and raw garlic are beneficial to the liver, while shellfish, alcohol, fats, and sugar are bad. Too much iron in the body is really bad for a person like me. Cauliflower and Oranges are good however. I'm going to have to make some changes. Some of my favorite foods like sushi, shrimp, bacon, and waffles are to be avoided. Oh, I need to excercise more too. Apparently, sweating is one of the most effective ways of eliminating toxins from the body.

None of this sounds like a lot of fun. Eating extravagantly rich food has always been one of my primary pleasures. On the other hand, I've been served vegetarian meals that are just as delicious as a well marbled steak. These meals always seemed difficult and time consuming to prepare, unfortunately. I may be a foodie, but I can't say that I really enjoy cooking. To successfully reform my diet, I need to find an easy, lazy man's way to enjoy my vegetables. The best solution for me would be a restaurant that consistently served delicious, totally healthy meals. Chefs are notorious for their liberal use of salt, butter and fat unfortunately. It's not surprising. These ingredients are usually what makes food taste so good.

It's not going to be easy, but radically improving my diet is going to be one of my primary goals for 2013. It might even take precedence over getting a new roof.

Malcolm is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1141

I don't know how I used to survive without weather radar apps on my phone and tablets. I totally depend on these things now. Even on days like today when the rain never seems to stop, I manage to find little pockets of calm when I can walk the dogs.

I used to live in fear of being struck by lightning when I found myself miles from home with two panic stricken Dalmatians in the middle of a sudden thunderstorm. This doesn't happen anymore. I carefully plot wind direction and speed using the radar apps and take the dogs outside during lulls between the passing squalls. I tell Dot and Dash that we don't have much time. They know they only have eight minutes to pee, poop and finish their business before we have to be home again. So far this new plan works fabulously. The dogs storm instincts are much better than mine anyway. They only panic if they think I don't know what's coming and am leading them into danger. Today, although everything got soaked; we didn't.

There's not much to do on a rainy day. Since I don't like to drive in the rain, I'm usually just stuck inside with the dogs, waiting for things to clear up. Luckily, I had plenty of writing and website work to keep me busy today. One of the charities I work with has a new volunteer who is full of energy and new ideas. This is great for the charity, but I'm not sure how great it will be for me. My workload has already increased. Things were easier when my contacts were just as tired and overworked as I am. I seldom get behind if I'm working with someone who is in even worse shape than I am.

I'm having lunch tomorrow with a friend who had a heart attack recently. Hopefully, he can give me some tips that can help me avoid the same fate. When friends and I used to have lunch, the talk usually centered around fast cars, music, and weird things our clients did. Now the conversation always seems to be about who has had the scariest near death experience. Talking about health problems has its benefits though. I usually think I'm falling apart until I listen to other people's trials and tribulations. Then I realize that things aren't so bad after all.

The weather radar on my phone says that the storms are almost over. That's good!  Maybe I'll get a decent amount of sleep tonight.

Spirit is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1140

It's hard to believe that it's been 27 years since the Space Shuttle Challenger exploded. It seems like yesterday. I was still working in an ad agency at the time, but only four years away from starting my own company. We all watched in total disbelief in the agency conference room as the shuttle disintegrated on live TV. Space flight has always been dangerous. I was an avid fan of the Apollo program when I was in college and was devastated when a fire destroyed the first Apollo capsule, killing all three astronauts. Years later, I actually heard the sonic boom as the Space Shuttle Columbia exploded over Texas during re-entry. I was walking the dogs at the time and didn't even realize what the loud noise was until I turned on the TV when I got home. Despite all the danger, I still wish we had become a spacefaring nation instead of a nation of whiners. It would be nice to see a colony on Mars during my lifetime. I have my doubts that this will ever happen though.

The law works in mysterious ways. I got a letter telling me that my subpoena had been withdrawn. Then, less than two hours later I got a call telling me that I had been subpoenaed all over again. WTF?  When I asked what was going on, the lawyer told me that after giving the matter some thought, they felt bad about having me served and decided to withdraw the first subpoena. He said they usually only served people who they thought would be hostile witnesses. OK. That sounds good to me. When I asked why I received a second subpoena, he said "Well, we still need your testimony."

I really can't figure out the weather we're having this winter. One day, it's bitter cold and I have to put on the dogs winter coats before we venture outside. The next day it could be sunny and seventy degrees. Back and forth like this it goes. Today was totally confusing. For most of the day it was gloomy and grey like you'd expect on a Winter's day. The temperature was 75 degrees though. This was much more like Summer.

Temperatures aren't the only thing that's been confusing me lately. I've been trying to come up with a healthy, low cholesterol diet that I can maintain indefinitely. It's not as easy as it seems. Yeah, I know I should eat oatmeal for breakfast, snack on raw walnuts, have plenty of fresh fruit, and substitute fish for red meat whenever I can. All this sounds great. I just haven't been able to put everything together in a tasty but brainlessly easy to follow menu yet. I did have some walnuts today though.

Molly is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1139

I woke up feeling strange this morning. I couldn't pin down the feeling, but I suspect that it had something to do with the medication the team of hepatologists had me discontinue last week. I remember that there was a warning on the side of the bottle that clearly said Do not discontinue this medication without consulting your physician. Here's where things get difficult. A reputable doctor actually did tell me to discontinue the medication. Unfortunately it wasn't the same doctor who told me to start taking it in the first place. So which doctor is right? Which organ is more important, the heart or the liver? You can see why I get frustrated with medicine at times.

We took a gamble on the dog park today. It had rained at our house overnight, but there were indications that the rain never reached the northern part of town where the park was located. Weather is often like this in Dallas. It can be pouring rain in one part of the city at the same time it is sunny and dry in another. I wish the dog park had a webcam on a pole where you could just get on the Internet and see if there were dogs in the park before making the journey yourself. There are no webcams in any of the local dog parks unfortunately. The city must have spent all their webcam money putting stop light cameras at every intersection. Fortunately, the gamble paid off today and the dog park was open. Dot and Dash had a great time and both dogs have been calm for the rest of the day.

It's hard to believe that January is already coming to a close. Didn't we just celebrate Christmas? Apparently, a lot of my neighbors are having the same problem with time getting away from them. I still see Christmas trees being tossed out by the curb almost every time I walk the dogs. It's time to take down the Christmas tree folks. Pretty soon it will be time to start fretting about taxes again. With the simple life I lead, I don't know how my taxes have become so complicated. Selling a house this year probably won't help matters either. If I could have a say in where my tax money actually went, I wouldn't mind paying taxes so much. No such luck though. I'm sure that every cent of my tax dollar goes to fund something I hate. 

I'm glad I live in Texas. The temperature was over 75 degrees today. After watching all those dismal pictures of cars sliding around on icy East Coast highways this weekend, I'm happy to report that I wore a t-shirt up to the dog park today. Our chilly, foggy, days seem to be over for a while. Hey, t-shirt weather in January is just fine with me. T-shirt weather all year long is fine with me. That's all I ever wear anyway.

Sophie is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1138

I went to see a nutritionist today. I've got to get beyond feeling good about myself for having a nutritious Kale salad one day and then going out and having a humongous bacon and chorizo omelet the next day. Consistency and discipline have never been my strong points. I need to clean up my act though. The team of hepatologists I saw earlier this week has put the fear of god in me. I definitely don't want to wind up on a transplant list.

It's too bad that eating unsalted nuts and fresh fruit isn't as appealing to me as a cheeseburger and a beer. Some people I know love to eat raw, unprocessed foods. Personally, I'd much rather have a pizza, or barbecued ribs. I have a feeling that those days are gone though. I'm going to have to learn to love something new.

This is the longest string of foggy days I can remember. One foggy day is a photo opportunity. A whole week of foggy days is just lousy weather. Although I have professed my love of fog many times on this blog, I'll have to admit I'm getting tired of it this week. I'm ready for a little sunshine.

I keep hearing on the news that stores are going to start adding and additional 4% to your bill for credit card transactions starting tomorrow. That sucks. I hate carrying cash around and use credit cards for virtually everything. I wonder if stores will actually try to pass on their transaction charges to customers, now that they're allowed to by law. It could go either way. Competition could keep prices the way are are currently. Or, the stores might get together just like the airlines have and try to stick their customers with every additional charge they can get away with.

I can't find anything on TV tonight. Sometimes I wonder why I even bothered to get U-Verse. There are dozens of channels filled with dumb shows like Storage Wars and Duck Dynasty. There's absolutely nothing that I want to watch though. You'd think with 500 channels, there would be at least five good ones. I find myself still watching old Seinfeld episodes because the new shows are so terrible. Sometimes I just stare at the NASA channel, watching astronauts floating around in the space station. It's not very dramatic, but at least it's not irritating.

Jazz is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1137

Why do people want to get me involved in their legal troubles? I already have plenty of doctors who are trying to scare me. The last thing I need are a bunch of lawyers trying to do the same thing. It was hard for me to get anything done today because attorneys on both sides of this lawsuit I got the subpoena for were calling me to ask what I'd told the other side. My answer was simple. I just did exactly what the court order told me to do. No more, no less. At least both attorneys agreed that this was the best thing to do. One of the lawyers asked me who the opposing lawyer was. When I told him, he said "Oh, I went to law school with him. He's a great guy." Small world, isn't it.

Sometimes I think I'd make a good lawyer. This is usually just when I'm watching old episodes of Perry Mason though. Janet, who knows much more about the law than I do, tells me that I'd make a terrible attorney. She's probably right. I can't even get picked for jury duty. When I tell people that I'm a writer during voir dire, the attorneys from both sides shun me like I had the plague.

It was another foggy day today. The fog didn't lift this time though. It was grey outside all day. I meant to take my car to the Land Rover dealer this afternoon, but ran out of time. I went to Autozone instead and bought another quart of oil. This is probably how the roof problem got so bad. I just keep putting things off.

Did any of you buy Apple at 700?  I'm sure glad I didn't. I was very tempted to buy the stock several times when it seemed invincible. Reluctantly, I followed my financial adviser's advice and resisted the temptation. I think I owe the guy an apology, because he apparently knew a lot more about Apple than I did. He kept telling me that Apple was going to fall, while I kept thinking that it was headed straight toward 1000 like some of the analysts were predicting on TV. Oh well, live and learn.

I almost took the pills that my new doctors told me to discontinue this morning. I need to hide these pills away somewhere, so I won't take them by mistake. I'm a creature of habit, just like my dogs.

Bones is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1136

I had an uneasy feeling when I pushed the elevator button to go up to the eighth floor. This wasn't the cozy little clinic I'd been used to. It was a huge, rather foreboding, research hospital. I had entered the big leagues for bad news. There should have been a sign on the front of the building that said "Don't even bother coming through these doors unless you have very good insurance." Everything about the place screamed expensive. There wasn't just one doctor this time. I had a team of doctors. They read through all the lab reports from the previous doctors and told me that things had changed. "We've learned a lot more about this disease," one of them said. At first I thought this was good news, but it wasn't. Apparently the doctor who told me that doing nothing was a viable option was completely wrong.

I was very disappointed to hear this, because doing nothing was exactly what I wanted to do. I was told to discontinue several medications. New tests were ordered. This was all just to determine if I was a good candidate for treatment. I have a feeling that this is going to be a very long year.

Despite my unsettling visit to the liver institute, it was a pretty good day. The weather was beautiful. We had heavy fog, followed by clear skies as the fog lifted. This is the kind of weather photographers love. The temperature was warm and there were photo opportunities around every corner. The dogs and I had a great walk before breakfast. I would have stayed out a lot longer if I didn't have work to finish.

One of the charities I work with wants to increase their exposure on social media. This certainly isn't news, since everybody wants to do this. We had a meeting tonight and I told them what I tell everybody. The secret to social media is consistent, original, interesting content. Tell a great story and people will start listening. It's that simple. This isn't what a lot of organizations want to hear though. They don't have the time to write interesting stories and take memorable pictures every day. What they want instead is some kind of nifty software that will automatically get thousands of new people to like them on Facebook. I keep telling them that what they are asking for is already out there. It's called Spam.

One of the doctors I saw today told me that he didn't think I was getting enough exercise. Are you kidding me? I walk five miles a day. Jeez! That should be enough for anybody. I proudly told the docs that I had given up drinking. I didn't tell them that I was still eating bacon.

Holly is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1135

When the dogs and I returned from our walk this morning, there was a process server waiting for us on the front porch. I was served with a subpoena. WTF? Why would anyone sue me? I am one of the most unlikely people on the planet to get involved with a lawsuit. I don't do much of anything and I rarely even see people. When I read through the legal documents I had been served with, I discovered that I wasn't being sued after all. Instead, I was being asked to give a deposition. It was one of my clients who was being sued and they apparently decided to drag me along for the ride. According to Janet, this probably wasn't a wise decision. She doesn't think I should even be allowed in a courtroom. "You talk too much," she tells me. When I told her about the deposition, she admonished me to just answer the lawyer's questions. "Don't try to regale the court with all your weird long-winded theories," she said. "It won't end well."

I saw some kids painting on the trunk of a dead tree the other day, so this morning I walked over to the tree to get a closer look at their handiwork. It actually looked kind of cool. Especially when framed as a square Instagram photo. This chunk of tree art reminded me of my friend Chuck in Seattle. He used to tell me that anything was art if you put it in a nice frame. To prove his point, he gathered up a bunch of trash he found on the street, flattened it out, and had the debris professionally framed. The resulting "pictures" eventually wound up in a gallery show and ended up getting good reviews.

Erykah Badu drove by in her big black Porsche Panamera while the dogs and I were walking past her house this morning. Sometimes I'd like to be a celebrity driving a big black Porsche. It probably isn't all it's cracked up to be though. I'm probably better off just walking dogs and taking pictures of painted tree trunks. I remember meeting Richard Petty once back in the days when I was doing Pepsi commercials. He was a real nice guy and insisted on eating Kentucky Fried Chicken out of a big bucket with me and the film crew at lunch instead of going off with the clients to a fancy restaurant. The guy seemed so tired though. You had to yell in his ear because he was stone deaf from years of racing. Whenever there was a break in the filming, his business manager put him to work signing autographed posters. All day long he signed these things wearing a special glove so he wouldn't get carpal tunnel. What kind of a life is that? I bet celebrities get sued a lot too.

I've got to go see the doctors at the liver institute tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to that at all.

Chloe is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day

Day 1134

I eliminated one of the two rattles I've been hearing in my car by stopping by an Autozone store and adding a couple of quarts of oil to the engine. Now, I've just got to figure out where the missing oil went. There were no drips or oily puddles under the car. I don't think it was leaking. There was no blue smoke coming out of the tail pipe either. I have no idea where the missing oil went, but I had to add a lot more than I thought I would to get the dipstick back in the safe zone. Although the mystery of the disappearing oil wasn't solved, the mystery of my expensive oil changes was. I had no idea that fully synthetic oil cost as much as it does. I used to think Land Rover was ripping me off when I went in for an oil change. Now that I know how much the oil itself costs, their price for the service is actually pretty reasonable.

I had a lot of website work today. Since there wasn't much else to do, I managed to get all of it done. Most of my remaining clients seem to like the time consuming custom work I do. I have a feeling that it's just a matter of time before they succumb to the lure of lower cost mass produced alternatives though. I wish I could get excited about cranking out template sites myself. I can't though. I'd rather create five totally unique sites than five hundred copies.

I took Dash to the vet today. Sometimes I think he doesn't even realize he's going there to get a shot. He's a social dog and just likes all the attention he gets during these bi-weekly visits. Dash's skin condition continues to improve, so we cut him back to a half dose of his medication this week. It's amazing how directly a dog's health correlates to a good diet. Once we got Dash on the right diet, his health improved dramatically. I'm sure the same thing is true with humans. If I ate a carefully formulated bowl of dry kibble every day, I'd probably be healthier too.

The monthly big trash truck comes tomorrow. I looked around the yard for fallen limbs and other debris to drag out to the street. I couldn't find much this month. I think most of the loose limbs have fallen off our trees already. I'd bag up some of this season's leaves and haul them out to the street too, if they weren't currently being used as a mud barrier to keep the dogs paws clean.

Raider is today's Dalmatian of the Day

Watch of the Day